


Kissing Other People

by Duck_Life



Category: Boy Meets World
Genre: Angst, Best Friends, Episode: s03e14 A Kiss Is More Than A Kiss, Friendship, Kissing, M/M, Season/Series 03, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-23
Updated: 2018-04-23
Packaged: 2019-04-26 14:27:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14404053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Duck_Life/pseuds/Duck_Life
Summary: Cory's having trouble moving on from Topanga. Shawn helps.





	Kissing Other People

Cory stomps into his house, with Shawn swinging the door shut behind him. “It’s not fair,” he says decisively, tossing his backpack on the kitchen table. “She’s moving on. I’m s’posed to be able to move on, too. I should be able to kiss other people.”

“Absolutely,” Shawn says, rummaging through the fridge for a cheese stick. 

“So why can’t I?” Cory asks. “I’m actually asking. I don’t want to be like…  _ this _ forever.” He tugs at the front of his shirt like he can tug out his own heart and pick and choose what it feels. “I want to kiss other people.”

Shawn sighs and sets his cheese stick on the counter, coming to stand in front of Cory. “You want to kiss other people?” He puts a hand on either side of Cory’s shoulders. 

“Yeah, that’s what I said.” 

So Shawn kisses him.

It’s one of those things that goes on just a second too long to be a joke. Despite that, when he comes away from it, Cory kind of smiles, kind of laughs. Obviously Shawn is trying to mess with him. Obviously. And besides, they’re always doing goofy shit like this, right? 

But Shawn isn’t laughing. His face has gone pale, and he’s got a look in his eyes that Cory recognizes too well. It’s the look he gets right before he bolts. 

“Shawn?”

Shawn laughs now, not a funny laugh, though. His laugh is nervous, panicked. “Yeah, Cor?”

Cory cocks his head to the side. He’s supposed to be able to read his best friend better than this. Supposed to be able to figure out which move to make next. Hanging with Shawn is like playing a video game he’s already beaten a million times before— usually. Usually he knows all the right buttons to push and all the right cheat codes. 

Now it’s like he’s hit a level he’s never seen before and no matter what he does, he loses. “How long you been waiting to do that?”

Shawn does his nervous laugh again and his hair falls into his face. “What’s today? Monday?”

“Yeah.”

“Six years.” He turns to go, but Cory grabs his shoulder and pulls him back and it’s suddenly different now than it was three minutes ago, suddenly different to be touching him than it has been his whole life leading up to now. “Look, I gotta— I gotta go, alright, Turner’ll be pissed off if I don’t start my paper tonight and…” He just stops. Just stops, just turns and looks at Cory, and all the charm and stubbornness and bravado is scraped away and he’s just Shawn and he’s just scared. 

“You in love with me?” Cory says. 

Shawn’s got that look again, that going-to-bolt look, but he stays. He stays and he says, “Just… turn around.”

“Shawn—”

“No, I don’t want you looking at me when I say it.”

So Cory turns around, faces the wall and the phone and the kitchen table where he and Shawn spent so many afternoons goofing off and pretending to do homework. 

“Yes,” Shawn says. “Okay you can turn back around.”

Cory turns and looks at his best friend and he’s got a million questions bouncing around in his head,  _ How did you know?  _ and  _ What does that mean for us? _ and  _ Is it other guys or is it just me? _ But he doesn’t ask those questions.

The question he asks is, “Why?”

Shawn almost laughs. “‘Why?’ Jesus, Cory. Because you’re you. Because you know more about me than anyone else in the world but you still want to be around me. Because when everything goes to shit you’re the only thing in my life that stays solid.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“When was I s’posed to do that?” Shawn says, throwing his hands up. “When you were in a closet with Topanga? When you were coming to me for advice about how to talk to girls?” 

“So were you ever gonna clue me in?”

“Yes,” Shawn says definitively. “Yes, yeah, I had it all planned out. I was gonna wait for the perfect moment… and then die.” 

“Shawn.”

“What? What do you want me to say? I never wanted to have this conversation,” Shawn says. “Because… because now you know and now it’s over.”

“What is?”

“Us,” Shawn says, gesturing to himself and to Cory. “Shawn and Cory, Cory and Shawn. Now you know that I’m… that I have… now it’s out there, and you and I can’t be friends anymore.”

“Bullshit.” Cory crosses the kitchen, stepping into Shawn’s space and taking it up, looking at him level. “We’ll always be friends. Even if you love me. Even if you hate me. I’ll always be your friend.” 

Cory hugs him, his hand fisting in the back of Shawn’s jacket. They hug for a lot longer than they kissed. Cory wonders if that’s significant— probably not, right? He pulls away but keeps a hand on Shawn’s shoulder, like he wants Shawn to know that he’s still solid. He’s still there. 

“Sorry I kissed you,” Shawn says.

“Don’t be,” Cory says, meaning it. “I’m sorry you love me.”

“Don’t be,” Shawn echoes. It hurts, Cory knows it hurts. And some part of him, the part that sometimes manages to realize things he shouldn’t be able to, knows that he’ll never completely understand the way Shawn’s hurting. 

He doesn’t want to understand Shawn’s pain; he just wants to make it go away. And with that in mind, he uses the hand that’s still on Shawn’s shoulder to pull him closer. He crushes his lips against his best friend’s, and for a moment it feels right. Weird, but right. 

Shawn breaks the kiss but doesn’t move away, just leans his forehead against Cory’s. “Don’t,” he says quietly. “Don’t do that if that’s not what you want.”

“I want you to be happy.”

“Be my friend,” Shawn says. “That’s all you ever need to do. And you’re really good at it.” Shawn picks up his almost-forgotten cheese stick. “I’m gonna… I’m gonna go walk around for awhile.”

“Shawn—”

“I’ll see you in homeroom tomorrow,” Shawn says, and Cory knows he means it. Shawn’s not running. Not this time. 

“Okay.”

Shawn leaves, swinging the door shut behind him. 


End file.
